“She also gave some to her husband,
who was with her, and he ate it.”
Genesis 3:6
Look at that verse. “Who was with her.”
Adam was right there next to her the whole entire time.
God had graciously given Adam a beautiful wife. However, she made poor choices. She was the kind of wife that brought her husband down. You might even say, “She brought him destruction and death.” How terrible. His helpmate wasn’t a helpmate after all. She didn’t protect or honor him in her actions.
However, before all the guys go into a full-blown celebration of how terrible she was, I have something important to point out. No hate mail please. I’m bringing to our attention what’s in the Bible in black and white. Adam was right there next to her as she was making all of those poor choices, leading to total destruction. He heard and watched it all happen before his eyes. He could have stopped it. It was within his power to do so. He chose to ignore, bringing disaster upon him, her, his future children, and the rest of humanity. It affected all of us.
Adam heard her speak with the serpent. She had an entire conversation while he listened. She even misquoted God. She said, “God said, 'You must never eat it or touch it. If you do, you will die!'" God never said all that. He never said, “Don’t touch it.” In fact, God never said a word to her. That’s right, God never told her anything.
God had told Adam only. She wasn’t even alive yet. Adam was given those instructions. In the chapter above, God told him. Eve wasn’t in the picture. God said to Adam, “But you must never eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil because when you eat from it, you will certainly die." First of all, that command was given to Adam, and secondly, God said nothing about touching it. He said, “Never eat from it.” Adam should never have allowed that conversation to take place and should never have eaten that fruit. Never!
I have lots of questions. I can’t help myself. Why didn’t Adam talk to the serpent, too? Why would he just stand there and allow the serpent to deceive his wife? Why didn’t he correct Eve by quoting correctly what God said? I mean, really? Not only did he stand there listening, but he watched his wife go over to the tree, touch it, break it off, put it in her mouth, and finally eat it, too. There’s no arguing, warning, threatening, refusing, or debating it. What a sad moment. One single act and destruction took place.
Eve takes a lot of punches. We love to blame her for totally messing up. No question she absolutely did. However, there was the head of that relationship there beside her, a covering, a final decision maker, a protector, a leader, a husband. Sorry to say, he did a very poor job being the head and leading his wife. We can’t even blame Eve for not listening, disrespecting, or dishonoring her husband. He was there. He was there, Folks, next to her watching, hearing, and participating. Eve never begged him, argued, or deceived him. He was a voluntary participant.
I wonder what would have happened if he stepped up as the leader and acted upon his God-given authority to lead his wife and to stop the serpent from deceiving her. A protector does just that. He protects. He watches who is a threat, and then steps up to the plate and protects who he loves. Listen carefully. Part of protecting means to hear what is being said audibly and spiritually. What if he had called upon God at that moment? “Show me what I need to do?” The truth is he already knew what to do. It was him who had told Eve what God said about that tree. God allowed him to do his job. He failed.
He could have said, “Eve, what are you doing? What are you thinking? God said, we are not to eat of it. Let’s go.” What if he took the fruit out of her hand and said, “You will not eat this. Let's go.” Better yet, when he saw her reaching out for the fruit, he could have taken her by the hand and led her away from it. Where was the protest and the lecture that should have taken place?
Please understand this. Adam was responsible for his wife. He was supposed to lead her, not the other way around. God told him not to eat the fruit of that tree. His responsibility was to lead, set the record straight. Stop the conversation and lead her away. He didn’t do it. Bringing her and him down. Now, I’m not excusing Eve. Eve made a decision based on a lie. She engaged an animal. Her husband had dominion of that entire garden. She took the word of an animal instead of believing and trusting her husband. He was the only one who knew the truth. I could say so much based on this one terrible moment in time.
Later we hear the blaming game take place with God. What’s interesting is the first thing God does is call the man. God called “The boss.” Adam blamed his wife. “It’s that woman’s fault.” He doesn’t even address her as Eve. Wow. Really? That should give us a clear picture of the kind of man he was. He took no responsibility for his actions. Eve blamed the serpent. But Adam? He blamed Eve, his wife. How sad. Let’s be clear. She didn’t shove the fruit down his throat, Folks. She handed it to him. She didn’t beg him to eat it. He took it, lifted his hand to his mouth, bit it, chewed it, and swallowed it all on his own. However, he blamed Eve. How sad.
Both were guilty. Love protects. Love honors. Love submits. Love watches over. Love safeguards. Love shields. Love defends. Love constantly keeps watch over the one they love from making irrecoverable mistakes. There’s no evidence of either doing this for each other. What a sad turn of events. A man who didn’t lead his wife from danger and a woman that led her husband straight to disaster and death. I don’t think any of us would choose Adam or Eve as partners. It doesn’t matter how smart and gorgeous they were. Partnering with either of them brings destruction and death.
God punished them all. From the serpent to the woman, including, the ground. Listen to me carefully please. Be very careful who you entertain and who you listen to. Life and death make all the difference. Be wise.
Dr. Teresa Allissa Citro
Founder and President
Thread of Hope, Inc.